Cold season apparently.
No sooner did my daughter start public school again than she brought home a head cold and shared it with myself and her dad. If there was ever anything I really wish she would keep to herself and not share, it’s the colds and flus that go around public schools.
It’s really hard to concentrate enough to accomplish anything when my head is stuffed right up. Worse is not having any energy and needing to nap to survive the day. Add to that the self imposed guilt which comes with not even being able to keep on top of my usual day tasks.
Not that beating up on myself is going to make the cold go away any faster. Especially since I know stress is only going to make it hang around longer.
It’s hard to give myself permission to rest and recover and know that I will be able to catch up on all the things I can’t manage right now. So hard to not feel guilty over slowing down and allowing my body to heal.
For as long as I can remember, my parents have had a plaque on the wall which reads “The Will of God will never lead you where the Grace of God cannot keep you.” It’s taken me my whole life up until recently to truly understand what the words mean.
Now I’m at a point where I can’t keep living a life where nothing is working for me. Where I’m constantly ill and tired and forced into whichever mould someone else would see me fit. I can’t do it anymore.
Jesus says I don’t have to.
I can accept the forgiveness, salvation, and healing He offers. From there, I can set out fresh, on a path God is laying out at my feet. A path along which I can trust Him to provide all I need. A path along which I will be able to use my unique, God given gifts to his greater glory.
God made me uniquely me. He gave me gifts, talents, abilities… whatever you want to call them. It only makes sense He would want me to live as me and no one else. He would want me to use the gifts He’s given me. That’s what I intend to do, to the best of my ability, from here on out.